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Ovation: Of Course A Squirrel Can Pull A Fire Alarm.

12/10/2011

I went to grade school in the same building that both my mother and father had attended (pictured).  It was a beautiful old limestone building that was built in 1896.  It had high ceilings and lots of windows.  It was originally built to serve as the town’s high school but, after a new high school was built in the 1920s, the building became classroom space for the elementary school.  It was built entirely of limestone mined from a local quarry and was quite beautiful.  On the upper floors there was a fire escape chute.  It was a metal tube about three feet in diameter that looked enormous and frightening to the smaller children.  All the children wanted to slide down that fire chute but it was deemed too dangerous so we used the stairs for all of our fire drills.

Oh, how we loved fire drills!  Any excuse to get outside for that matter.  We would “proceed in an orderly fashion” down the wide staircases to our assigned safety areas around the school grounds to wait for the all clear.  We would watch the old building to see if we saw any smoke, but we never did.  The old building still stands (converted to condominiums), as beautiful and stately as ever situated atop the hill overlooking the now-historic village.

I only recently learned that squirrels could start a fire drill.  After a false alarm in this school, officials reviewed security video to see which bratty child had pulled the alarm.  Surprise!  I wonder if this squirrel had a history test that he hadn’t prepared for or. maybe, he only wanted to go outside.

Copyright © 2011 DiatribesAndOvations.com
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From → Ovations

6 Comments
  1. Rene permalink

    Squirrels are evil.

    Like

  2. Freaking squirrels. I swear to God that one gave me the finger last week when I chased it away from the bird feeder.

    We have one that is the size of a feral cat. He sits up in the trees throwing acorns at me and then pissing on my dogs. Evil, indeed.

    Like

  3. I saw this story and couldn’t help but wonder: where was this squirrel when i was in school!!!

    Like

  4. I take it all back. Feral squirrel got run over by a car yesterday. Poor thing.

    No, it wasn’t me!

    Like

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  1. Diatribe: The Hazzard County Squirrel Slam. « DiatribesAndOvations

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