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Diatribe: “Bachelorette”, Emily Maynard, Ends Another Made-For-Television Engagement.


It’s often quite difficult to find someone who can stand to be with you for any length of time, yet we hope to find a perfect mate … someone with whom we can make and share memories and, eventually, grow old with … a special person to share life’s “journey”.  From the billions of people on the planet, we hope to find “the one”.

Many of us do.  And those who don’t must keep on trying.  But usually not on network television.

Emily Maynard, of The Bachelor and The Bachelorette fame, tragically lost her first fiancé, professional NASCAR racer Ricky Hendrick, in a plane crash in 2004.  She had been dating him since they were only fifteen years old and he had finally proposed to her just six months earlier.  Just days after his death, Emily learned she would be having his child, their now six-year-old daughter Ricki.

She persevered and, eventually, found herself looking for love as one of the women competing for the attention of Brad Womack on Season 15 of The Bachelor.  Ultimately, Emily won Brad’s heart and, in the season finale, Brad got on bended knee to ask if she would be his wife.  She said “yes” but their on-screen love story fizzled just months later.

Not giving up on her dream of a husband and a father for Ricki, when ABC invited her back to try again Maynard agreed to appear as the eighth Bachelorette.  The beautiful, sweet, young mother who captured America’s heart thought she might finally meet him.  After all, it had worked for her once before.  Eventually, she fell in love with contestant Jef Holm, an entrepreneur and self-proclaimed “total romantic” from Saint George, Utah.  Jef, like Brad before him, was mesmerized by Emily and asked for her hand in marriage.  She said “yes” last July but their on-screen love story has also fizzled just months later.

“I am sorry to tell you that Jef and I have, indeed, parted ways.  It was a very difficult and heartbreaking decision.  As you know, at first I wasn’t sure that I should even be The Bachelorette, but I am a hopeless romantic and I do believe in the show.  [I have] no regrets because I did find love and shared an incredible journey.  [Our love was] so real, [but we are] just at different points in our lives.  I’m excited and hopeful for the next chapter in my life with my daughter, Ricki.  I do hope that you will respect our privacy and allow us the time we need to heal.” – Bachelorette, Emily Maynard to

Yeah … sure, we’ll respect your privacy as long as you stay off of our televisions.

“Emily and I are great friends and I hope we can continue to be friends forever. Everyone wants a salacious story to break, but the truth is we are just two people who fell in love and tried our hardest to make it work. I will always love her.” – Jef Holm.

I’m sorry, but I don’t buy it.  While the whole The Bachelor and The Bachelorette “franchise” continues to be a money-making venture for the network, drawing huge ratings from loyal and long-time fans, the fact of the matter is that it just doesn’t work.  Of all the winning couples, only one (The original Bachelorette, Trista Rehm, and her husband, Ryan Sutter) is actually married (having been paid one million dollars for the right to televise the wedding) and a second (Season Seven’s Bachelorette, Ashley Hebert and her fiancé, J.P. Rosenbaum) is scheduled to be married in December (having been paid an unknown amount for the right to televise their wedding).

Dating programs can be entertaining.  The Dating Game, after all, was an off-and-on success for decades, inspiring many similar programs along the way.  But that’s really all they are … programs.  Television is entertainment … and it’s a business.  And people who take marriage seriously understand that true love is not a spectator sport.  You can’t be paid to find it.

I sincerely hope that Emily finds the man of her dreams … or finds contentment as a single mother who is not on television.


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Copyright © 2012

From → Diatribes

  1. T-minus fifteen minutes and counting until they sign up for another “reality” show.


  2. Barneysday permalink

    How shallow this woman, in fact all contestants, must be if they really believe they are going to find the love of their lives on staged television. How shallow they and their producers must be if they believe that viewers believe in their “made for tv” romance. And you are right.she gave up all rights to privacy when she signed on the dotted lines of her contract and cashed the check.

    I feel sorry for her daughter, being raised by such an empty shell of a mom.


  3. They should do the show based on “dates” that happen in real life not cart them all over the world. Give them real “after show” moments. I bet the odds are the couple would stay together longer. LOL


    • To a degree, I don’t think it’s all that much different than other matchmaking services that compare statistics to create a match. I believe in love at first sight, but I also can tell the difference between a genuine relationship and one that is made for television.


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