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Diatribe: Saying Things That Don’t Make Sense.


WarningSometimes I say stupid things.

Waiter:  “Enjoy your meal.”
Me:  “You, too!”

As I get older, it seems that this is happening to me more and more frequently.  I joke that I don’t have a “filter” between my brain and my mouth so this explains some of my faux pas but not all of them.

I’m not the only one with this problem.

Dairy Queen Employee:  “Is this for here or to go?”
Skinny Lady:  “Yes.”

TSA Agent to Passenger:  “Have a safe flight.”
Passenger:  “You, too.”

Other stupid things that we say include:

“Same difference.”

“I thought to myself.”

“Did I wake you?”

“I could care less.”

“It was surreal.”

“I can’t wait.”

There are many other frequently-used phrases that don’t necessarily make sense yet we say them anyway.  Pay close attention today and you’ll see for yourself.  Some of the things we say don’t make any sense … even when said by those of you with filters.

What do you regularly say that doesn’t make sense?


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From → Diatribes

  1. thedogs'mother permalink

    We have ‘family-isms’ which only make sense to us. “Did you have an Aunt Rosie?” “Look there’s a dead tree!” “Tactical Error!” “There were two ducks sitting on a log”


  2. I am glad I am not the only one.


  3. Bill Engvall has a great routine called “Here’s Your Sign” for these sayings. Things like: A cop comes upon a semi-trailer stuck under a bridge. He says to the driver ‘Stuck huh?” The driver replies with “No I was delivering this here bridge & ran outta gas. Here’s your sign.”


  4. “I could care less” — drives me crazy. Shouldn’t it be “I couldn’t care less”?


  5. I finish almost every conversation or snippet of a conversation with “have a nice day” or a more time-suitable variation of it.

    It usually works, unless someone had posed a last-minute question to me before I was walking off.


  6. My favorite right now is “Talk to the fist ’cause the hand ain’t listenin’ no more!”


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  1. Diatribe: Sometimes It’s Best To Say Nothing At All. | DiatribesAndOvations

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