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Diatribe: Don’t Beat Up Your Sister Because She Wants The Toilet Seat Down.

03/06/2014

ToiletSeatI don’t think anyone ever really WANTS to live with a roommate.  Sharing expenses is usually done out of necessity rather than for companionship or to avoid loneliness.  It’s probably safe to say that living alone is generally preferable to having another person, with all of their possessions and bad habits, under the same roof twenty-four hours per day.

The tension can be amplified if the roommate is of the opposite sex.  Men and women have many different household needs, wants and habits that are often polar opposites.  Nowhere is this more obvious than in the bathroom.  While a man might confidently start his day with nothing more than a toothbrush and some deodorant, his female roommate might require an arsenal of ten times as many lotions and potions to feel presentable enough to venture outdoors each morning.

Even the best of platonic friends argue about shared bathroom etiquette.  One of the biggest complaints from women has always been that men don’t put the toilet seat down when they’ve finished using it.  Men, of course, argue that women should check before they sit.  It’s a vicious circle.

Apparently, it can be even more vicious when the argument is between a sister and a brother who share a residence.

Thaddeus Morgan, 24, of West Fargo, North Dakota, was arrested last month for interfering with an emergency call and misdemeanor assault resulting from an argument that he had with his younger sister, Cynthia, when she got mad at him for not putting the toilet seat down.  Apparently, the fight they had over their toilet seat’s position involved pushing and slapping to the point that the police became involved.  Cynthia told authorities that, in addition to breaking her glasses, her brother also grabbed the phone from her when she called 911 for help which resulted in the additional charge.

Thaddeus pleaded not guilty and is scheduled to be back in court on April 2nd.

There are currently a number of self-closing toilet seats on the market that would easily solve this age-old problem.  For under two hundred dollars, far less expenses than an attorney and court costs should the need arise, opposite-sex roommates can avoid this unavoidable conflict.  Perhaps one day the installation of these toilet seats could be a marketing tool for landlords.

Do you have this toilet seat argument at your house?

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5 Comments
  1. thedogs'mother permalink

    Dogs using the toilet as a water bowl usually solves that problem.

    Like

  2. There is a reason these instances appear on Morons in the News on the various radio shows. We keep the lids down for the dog issue above.

    Like

  3. I’m with TDM. It goes down to keep the cats and the dog out of it.
    But, if there ever was a argument about it, I don’t think it would result in fisticuffs.

    PS I just wanted to say ‘fisticuffs’.

    Like

  4. It’s good to see 911 being used properly.

    Like

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