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Diatribe: Flushing Matters.


The toilets in my office building are motion-activated and designed to automatically flush when their sensors detect someone standing up after doing their business. They waste an incredible amount of water but they certainly keep the restrooms clean. Often a commode will flush as you approach it, again, when you stand, if you turn to adjust your clothes, etc. Sometimes they’ll flush four times.

I think it’s sad that this technology exists simply because people are too lazy, inconsiderate or straight-up gross to flush toilets when they’re finished using them.

Andrew David Jensen (pictured) should take notes.

Jensen was accused of burgling a southern California home last October. Last month, Jenson, 42, was arrested after police in Thousand Oaks, California, used DNA found in an unflushed toilet to identify him.

Detectives found some fecal matter in a toilet at the crime scene and had it tested for DNA. The sample was sent to the Ventura County Sheriff’s Office Forensic Services Bureau for processing before being submitted to the Combined DNA Information System to see if there was a match with a known suspect.

“Most people don’t assume or don’t know that DNA can be obtained by other things besides hair and saliva. We look for any type of evidence that might be left behind. Whether it’s a smoked cigarette or a can that may be left behind, we will analyze it.” – Ventura County Sheriff’s Office Detective Tim Lohman

Police got a DNA match on July 25 for Jensen, who they tracked down to his home in nearby Ventura where he was arrested three days later on suspicion of first-degree residential burglary, a felony, according to the Associated Press. His bail was set at $180,000.

The moral of this story appears to be DON’T FORGET TO FLUSH ON-THE-JOB or FLUSHING MATTERS.

Perhaps the toilet technology in my office building is ahead of its time.


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