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Diatribe: Gags The Green Bay Clown.

Gags the Green Bay ClownWe’ve done a lot of gardening and planting around our house this spring and have spent quite a bit of time trying to determine how we’ll install landscape lighting.  After purchasing some inexpensive solar lights that we’ve moved around several times, the right locations for their placement appear to have been determined. This weekend, weather permitting, we’ll work to install the light system and move on to the next project on our list.

Outdoor lighting serves several purposes and, because our home is in a somewhat remote neighborhood, we find a sense of security in knowing that our home is well-lit both when we’re away and while we’re inside.

We’re not afraid of the dark, but we also don’t live in Green Bay, Wisconsin where a mysterious and creepy-looking CLOWN has been roaming the streets in the dead of night.

According to a Facebook page called “Gags – The Green Bay Clown”, the first sighting of the scary clown occurred on Monday around 2:00 a.m.  Since then several other photos of the clown have been taken, mostly in the same area.

Local police are getting calls about the scary visitor but there’s not much than can be done.

“A person can walk down the sidewalk dressed however they want as long as they’re in a place they legally can be and they’re not in a place that has a closing time, like a park.” – Green Bay Police Capt. Kevin Warych

There is speculation that the clown is part of a viral marketing stunt, one reason being the mysterious Facebook page’s appearance just shortly after the clown’s first sighting.

I know a few people who are immensely frightened by the most harmless of clowns. I imagine seeing Gags walking down their street would send them screaming in terror!

One thing’s for sure, if I ever encounter a creepy clown carrying black balloons in our neighborhood I’ll be glad we’ve got plenty of lights around our house.  We might even add some more!

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Ovation: SaltWater Brewery’s Edible Six-Pack Rings.

Saltwater BreweryI enjoy spending time on, or near, the water.  I’ve always found lakes and beaches to be some of the most fascinating places to visit.  The fact that a seashore constantly changes with the tides is simply marvelous in my mind.  I can walk along a beach for hours, picking up driftwood and sea shells, examining flora, marveling at the antics of birds and, of course, people watching.

Too often on excursions of this nature I’ve come across creatures in distress.  The sight of a pelican or sea gull strangled by fishing line or a plastic 6-pack holder, in particular, has left a lasting, vivid memory.  So much so that at our house we avoid buying products that incorporate this technology. When we can’t avoid them, we make a point to cut them into tiny pieces before discarding them.  I hate to think that some bird might die because I didn’t cut up a 6-pack holder.

Edible-Six-Pack-Ring-screenshot-We-BelieversSaltWater Brewery of DelRay Beach, Florida, has developed a technology that will eliminate the needless suffering of marine creatures caused by plastic 6-pack holders.  The craft beer maker has created a six-pack carrier made out of the wheat and barley waste leftover after making their beer.  Their invention is as strong as the usual plastic six-pack carrier but are biodegradable and even safe for animals to eat.

This particular brewery was founded by fishermen and surfers who have close connections to the ocean.  Apparently, they’ve learned that even if you cut plastic rings to keep animals from getting entangled in them, birds and turtles will still eat the plastic!  Who knew?!

“We want to influence the big guys,” says Chris Gove, the brewery’s president, in the video below, “and inspire them to also get on board.”

The new technology remains somewhat costly but, hopefully, the demand for new, eco-friendly packaging will rise, creating a competitive market of other brewers, soft-drink makers etc. that will drive the cost down to be competitive with plastic.

I’m not usually a beer drinker but I’ll try some of theirs … but I won’t eat the six-pack carrier.

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Copyright © 2016 www.DiatribesAndOvations.com

Diatribe: Nadkins.

NadkinsWe come across them all the time … things we didn’t know we don’t need. There is a peculiar marketplace available where entrepreneurs who think they’ve discovered the solution to enormous problem facing the world can peddle their wares. This is where consumers go to find things like potato peeling gloves that will save hours of time in the kitchen. Or Rake Hands that make outdoor clean up super quick and easy. Booty Belts and Miracle Socks are available to eliminate unsightly bulges and soothe tired, achy legs and feet. Most of the things we don’t know we don’t need we don’t know about unless they’re As Seen On TV.

But did you know there’s a new addition to the little-talked about world of men’s grooming products that most men don’t know they don’t know about?

Nadkins.

Nadkins “Male Jewels Refresher Towelettes” are cleansing wipes designated as wet naps for the male nether regions for when things get all sweaty, smelly and uncomfortable. According to the Nadkins website, each individually wrapped towelette is 100% natural and 100% non-toxic. Key ingredients like Aloe Vera, Allantoin and Vitamin E gently cleanse and hydrate sensitive skin, while pleasantly soothing and comforting, leaving you with a refreshing tingly feeling that’s something to behold.  Here’s the company’s Mission Statement:

Nadkins Mission Statement

Apparently, after wiping down the area, users will get a cooling and refreshing reeling without any irritation while removing dead skin and helping to protect against added aggravation. The product’s name, allegedly, was born out of a conversation between the company’s founder and a friend who suggested that “guys don’t always smell so great … down there” leading to his response of “Yeah … it’s like they need a napkin for their nads … a Nadkin!”

A ten-pack of individually wrapped Nadkins sells for $12.50 on the company’s website. A discount is offered to customers who sign up for subscription deliveries. A deeper discount is available for volume purchases.

Now that you know about this didn’t know you didn’t know about it marketplace, be sure to check out Nadkins’ competition!

biz wipesMangroomer Biz Wipes provide a “masculine executive scent”. Close your eyes and try to imagine THAT. These are advertised as “flushable”!

NicheNiche for Men by Birchbox can also be used on the face. If it’s safe for down there … (You can “Join the Revolution” and save 20%!)

Junk stuffOr maybe you’d like to keep some Junk Stuff in your desk at the office. It’s a cream that uses essential oils and vitamins to clear up rashes and rawness.

Nadkins. Let me know if you enjoy their “subtle, pleasing citrus-mint fragrance”.

Or you could use soap and water.

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Copyright © 2016 www.DiatribesAndOvations.com

Ovation: America’s Oldest Teacher, Agnes Zhelesnik, Is An Inspiration!

Americas-Oldest-Teacher-screenshot-The-74When I was in high school, at least one of my teachers had also had my parents in her classroom. I remember her as being very strict and her class quite boring. But mostly I just remember her as being the “old teacher”. My folks thought she was old when they were in her class. I’m sure every school has senior instructors and, naturally, anyone over the age of forty appears to be a fossil to a high school freshmen so it’s not surprising that teachers often appear to be out-of-touch with young people.

Of course, nothing could be further from the truth. Who knows more about young people than their teachers? These are the people who spend time with rooms filled with them every day!

Can you imagine becoming a teacher late in life? After all of your peers have long ago retired?

Agnes Zhelesnik, or “Granny” as she is called by students and teachers alike at the Sundance School in North Plainfield, New Jersey where she began working in 1994 … at the age of 80! … celebrated her 102nd birthday this week! And she’s still teaching classes!

After life as a homemaker, Agnes jumped at the chance to take a job as a sewing and cooking instructor to five- and six-year-olds. Her daughter, an art teacher at the school, first asked her if she’d like to help out in the cafeteria and later, when the cooking class actually needed a teacher, Agnes thought that was the perfect place for her. Over the years she’s sewn colorful aprons for students to keep their clothes clean in the kitchen and has made costumes for their school plays.

“Just be happy with what you’re doing,” Agnes told the education group, The Seventy Four, in the video below. “You have to like what you’re doing.”

I didn’t realize it at the time, but I was quite fortunate to have that old, boring teacher in high school. Looking back, I can imagine that she reinforced ideas my parents had taught me at home in addition to new materials in the classroom. She was probably more lovely than I remember.

At 102, Agnes Zhelesnik is an inspiration to anyone who fears aging. Don’t you just love her?!

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Diatribe: Know The Difference Between A Selfie And A Mug Shot.

Chip PughWhen we gathered to open our gifts we found several packages underneath the Christmas Tree, all shaped exactly the same and wrapped in identical holiday paper. They each had a name tag and there was one for everyone in the family … except for me.

Santa brought “selfie sticks” to our house this Christmas … but not to me. Like everyone who knows me, Santa is quite aware that I do not enjoy being photographed and that I absolutely will not be taking pictures of myself in the foreseeable future … with or without a stick. I’m about as anti-selfie as they come.

All I see is chins.

Plus, I know what I look like. So selfies aren’t important to me.

Apparently, Donald “Chip” Pugh is very concerned with the quality of photos that are taken of him. After the Lima, Ohio, Police Department issued a warrant for his arrest for Failure to Appear, Pugh, 45, who is also currently a person of interest in several other cases, sent them a selfie because he didn’t like the mug shot they were using in their attempts to apprehend him.

After police posted his booking photos asking the public’s help to find him, Chip sent them a picture of himself in a sport coat and sunglasses along with a message stating “Here is a better photo. That one is terrible.” Then he called a radio station to talk about it, drawing more attention to himself and eventually making it easier for him to be found.

What an arrogant fool.  #thanksfortheselfie

Thanks to the power of social media and tips called in to authorities, Pugh was arrested on Tuesday in Century, Florida, where he is being held on another warrant out of Georgia.

The Lima Police Department has updated its Facebook page using a new mug shot of a smiling Pugh after his recent arrest.

I hope he likes this mug shot. I could be his last.

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Copyright © 2016 www.DiatribesAndOvations.com

Ovation: Charlotte Heffelmire’s Citizen Lifesaving Award.

CharlotteFor many college students living on campus and away from home “fall break” is often the first opportunity of the school year to travel to see family and friends. Going home for the holidays can become the “light at the end of the tunnel” that students need to keep them focused on their school work. After what I remember as being a difficult week (or two) of final semester exams, it was always nice to have time at home to relax before heading back to start new chapters, electives, etc. with a fresh attitude and having had plenty of rest.

While visiting her family at home in Vienna, Virginia, Charlotte Heffelmire didn’t get as much rest over the holidays as she might have liked.

Her father, Eric, had been under the family’s truck working on its brake lines when the vehicle slipped off a jack and pinned him beneath the front end. Sparks began shoot, igniting leaking gasoline into flames. Eric struggled for ten minutes but couldn’t free himself until Charlotte happened to walk into the garage. She immediately ran to the front of the burning GMC utility pickup truck and, barefoot, tried lifting it off her father. It didn’t budge. She tried again and was, surprisingly, able to lift it high enough to free him and drag him away from the flames.

“She’s a pretty amazing kid. But, you know, it must’ve just been adrenaline and not wanting to see me burn to death that night.” – Eric Heffelmire

Realizing the burning truck was still a threat to the house and the rest of her family inside, she climbed behind the wheel, floored the gas pedal and steered into the yard on just three wheels.  Charlotte then went inside to get her family and proceeded to calmly call 911 to assist the local fire department in saving their home.

The Fairfax County Fire and Rescue Department has awarded her a Citizen Lifesaving Award for her heroic actions.

The Heffelmire family must be very proud of Charlotte. I think the most heroic thing I ever did on a fall break was make my bed or, maybe, take out the garbage.

UPDATE 01/20/16: Ellen DeGeneres presents Charlotte Heffelmire $10,000.00 from Shutterfly for her bravery!

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Like this post? Follow the blog and get involved in discussions! Find “Follow via Email” on the right side of the page.  There’s also an opportunity to follow on Twitter and/or LIKE our page on Facebook so you won’t miss a daily post.  Click on buttons at the end of each post to share on other social media sites, too!  Thanks for reading!

Copyright © 2016 www.DiatribesAndOvations.com

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